Pure Joy

Ok so I have put off dealing with yesterday for a full day and now feel I must “put pen to paper”. I have been reluctant on two counts. First the fairly intense personal component to yesterdays activities and second I figured this would be a longer than usual blog and there never seems time or energy to do it justice. Given that there never will be an ideal time - here goes.

Yesterday was the culmination of a long series of events that started on 23rd Jan 2004. As a member of the Royal Canadian mounted Police I had been asked to examine several videotapes of the sexual assaults of young Asian girls by a Canadian pedophile. I was tasked with determining the country in which the girls were assaulted. It was with these tapes that my life took another turn. We can all imagine what goes on in child brothels but seeing it is absolutely indescribable. I, having developed Ratanak and having spent years serving the people of Cambodia had a great love for Cambodian kids. I had adopted two wonderful Cambodia boys and was, well, emotionally involved. I was not ready to see Cambodian kids assaulted. Strangely it was not the assaults that were most upsetting it was the faces of the kids. The bewildered look on these faces, small faces, really small faces, will be with me for life. Aside from the investigational issues, how could I possibly help such kids swallowed up in this terrible world? These faces would haunt me as I longed for the girls to be safe. But there was little I could do for them except pray – which I did – often.

As God would plan it I had not only the country where the assaults occurred but the GPS locations of the rooms in which they occurred in a few days. Here started years of struggling to assist such children leading to the prevention programs, rehabilitation centers and safe houses that operate today.

Through this whole process it became clear that most of these little girls that I had seen so violated had in fact bee rescued. I took comfort in knowing that they were safe. I had no contact as these traumatized kids had seen way too many white males. I continued to seek after the last identified girl from the tapes, Sung, who was never rescued.

I was absolutely thrilled, about a year ago to find that the recovering girls from these original tapes where placed in a foster care program funded by Ratanak.
With all that as background you can just imagine what a thrill it was for me to be invited to visit with them this week. I confess to being terrified. I did not want to fall apart. (Such kids would not understand me being upset and would assume they had done something wrong). But I had prayed for them for years. I knew their faces and names and they were very important to me. How could I face these girls and not be overwhelmed?
Yesterday…
The truck pulls up to the rehabilitation center and we run inside to escape the rain. We have a meeting with the staff – wonderful talented and dedicated people. But even as I ask them questions I am totally distracted. Every movement out of the corer of my eye warrants a quick glance. Where the girls here? Would be as I expected? Would they be approachable? I was both excited and worried about all of this – almost five years of emotional investment has a way of making its presence felt… No sign of the girls.
After the meeting we went up stairs and I was watching the rain from the veranda when suddenly there was a whole bunch of girls there. Not sure where they all appeared from but there they were. Instantly, and I mean instantly, I could pick out those faces so very familiar to me. Older now. No longer pained but beautiful, bright and animated. I was stunned, not emotional, just sort of frozen and studying every detail of their smiles and drinking in the laughter and joy they expressed. I chatted with them and melted.
Then it was off to their home. I was to visit their foster home – the one we fund. I was given, for me, the profound privilege of going in the pink Tuk Tuk that belongs to the center, with the girls. Beth came with me as me being alone with them would not be appropriate. As we drove I asked them questions and showed them photos of my family. They were interested in by two wonderful Cambodian boys. I just kept trying to grasp that I was there actually chatting with the children that had so broken my heart years before - it was indescribable.
At their home we were invited in and given the opportunity to see their rooms. I went up the stairs following the slapping noise of the bare feet on tile as the girls charged up ahead of me. I was careful to glance back to make sure Beth was right behind me. I had no intention of accidently being any where near these girls alone. (guarding their sense of security is huge.)
We toured the rooms. They showed us all their stuff and then headed back down stairs where I was to find out they had a little presentation for me. I had held things together very well to this point. The girls had made each member of the team a big folded paper lotus flower which they presented. A speech of thanks was then made. Ok so now there is lump in my throat the size of an apple. I’m really having to work at holding it together. After four years of prayer not only was I privileged to see these, now young women, but they are thanking me! Following this “M” stepped forward and presented me with a gift. It is a decorated pen and came with a story. ( I wont get into that as there is a funny sense that I need to keep a little bit of this story just for me.) On the pen in carefully woven string were the letters “BRIAN”. I sat momentarily silent, unable to speak fearing I would totally loose it. Gulping I gave my thanks and asked if I could pray with and for them. This I did sensing heaven creeping into the room. But then to my surprise they asked to pray for us. Words cannot utter how overwhelming that was. Strong prayers of thanks and protection were being showered on US by these – the little lost girls from years ago. God had answered our prayers for them way more than I could have asked or imagined!
We left the house waving to our newly found little sisters and I continued to look at my pen and gulp!
Tonight I took a motto out to the area where Sung, the missing one, is known to be. I long for her to know safety. I didn’t see her. I will continue to look. This story is not complete until the last sheep is recovered - however long that takes.
Brian.
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Why Bother with Strategic Planning?

Today our team met with several of the go-getters of Hagar Cambodia. After we greeted one another around the board table, Hagar’s executive director started off by sharing the agency’s vision, mission and strategic direction statements. Usually this is not the best way to grab an audience’s attention particularly at 8:30 AM. But I noticed that everyone was listening. We were being introduced to an “excellent practice” of strategic planning. The words contained in the document spoke of real meaning beyond words. The message was clear, focused and very targeted. After just a couple of minutes I really knew what Hagar was all about and what it was not. It was obvious that these statements really were part of its organizational culture.

Hagar’s mission speaks about, “quality restoration of abused, exploited, and rejected women and children to a life of resilient dignity”. Its “brand” was sharp, to the point, and clear- resilience and holistic change for women and children so that they can return and positively impact their own communities. I know lots of organizations that post their mission statements on a wall; but that in reality it is never used or followed by 99% of people in the organization… remaining as static words in a document or plaque. But this did not seem true for Hagar. These words seemed to mean something.

Ratanak has been a critical partner of Hagar, providing significant investment and encouragement for several years. So it was wonderful to see Ratanak’s role in creating an environment that led to transformation of children and women- spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

In the afternoon we visited the shelter and then to one of the group homes, sponsored by Ratanak. I am sure that in Hagar’s strategic plan, it includes the monitoring of expected and actual results in nice and clean boxes. But this afternoon we experienced first hand the REAL results in meeting and interacting with several wonderful girls and youth. Before being brought into this shelter, and then into linked foster homes and group homes, these girls lived hell on earth being used and abused by men. Many were betrayed by their own families into the sex trade. Today I could only smile deep in my heart in seeing what God has done in His restoration work. These girls welcomed us with such a gracious spirit- demonstrating kindness and joy.

Before we left, the girls shared that they had a gift for each of us. Then each one of us received a prized possession- a paper locus flower. We were stunned! Then we all sat down in a circle, as Brian prayed for the girls. After his prayer, one of the girls asked if she could pray for us. It was a beautiful time as she led us to the throne of grace.

Yes today we leant that an organization should bother with strategic planning as long as it is bathed in love, compassion, and care; and to always have the end in mind- in this case that rejected and exploited women and children are to be helped to live a life of resilient dignity.

Stephen Lauer